Is Anxiety Real?
If I let myself, I can become a real anxious person. And I know why?
Growing up in a small island in a village that people were friendly to each other and in a large extended family that despite all its idiosyncrasies loved and cared for each other. Looking out for each other was a part of life. We did not have phones, people rode bikes or motorbikes if they had one. Usually we walked, or took public busses.
People would leave home and give a time, when they will be back in an hour or will be back in 2 hrs, and as time came close for the return, you would always find family members on the street pacing for the return of the family member, if they had concerned that more than an average amount of time has been lapsed, they will call any neighbouring lads to go and have a look and see if they can find the late comer.
Sometimes the news was not good, I distinctly remember a few episodes when the loved one was lost fishing or wounded in a brawl even a young couple who ran away from their respective homes. Which always meant a long lecture to the young people at home. Then the episode became the topic of discussion, within the family or within the community.
It was love and fear of losing the loved one I think that kept the family members on edge. I myself have an unfavourable reaction to the word “goodbye”. I have thought of it and now it started
because as a child we were not allowed to say goodbye, as it meant that is the last time we would meet, we were scolded and asked to say “see you soon”. Which meant hope for longer life and another meeting.
As my generation is growing older this seem to be so much less significant, but I know it's still there, as in my family I discourage the use of word goodbye, having said this being married to an Australian, occasional white man, who encountered hardly any superstitious beliefs, it was hard for him to understand. I do not think he yet fully understands but he would rather see me happy and not use words that distress me. I on the other hand have worked over the years on my own internal beliefs, that it is not as significant to me as it used to be.
But that only means that I have learned and can manage my reactions better, fear is always there. Or just need a sound or a thought or a smell or a word to trigger it.
So what is anxiety?
It is this unwanted thought and fears that have no real cause to it, or its cause was an old one, and they make everyday life very difficult even years later.
Beyond Blue describes Anxiety as “When anxious feelings don't go away, happen without any particular reason or make it hard to cope with daily life it may be the sign of an anxiety condition.”
There are many types of anxiety disorders, you may get anxious about one particular thing talking to strangers, or you may feel anxious in almost every situation in life.
The link to beyond blue site is on the show notes, so please have a look there are few more links for you.
If you ever thought to yourself in this situation let's look at some statistics from different countries, then here is why this is important as we journey together and we talk more about a resilient life you will understand it better.
According to
In Australia according to beyond blue
“Anxiety is the most common mental health condition in Australia. On average, one in four people–one in three women and one in five men–will experience anxiety at some stage in their life1. In a 12-month period, over two million Australians experience anxiety.”
In America according to anxiety and depression association of America
Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18.1% of the population every year.
UK
An estimated 1 in 6 adults have experienced a 'common mental disorder' like depression or anxiety in the past week.
Singapore
The key findings from the SMHS 2016 show that: 1 in 7 people in Singapore has experienced a mood, anxiety or alcohol use disorder in their lifetime.
I do not think anxiety favours someone in particular, and there are so many reasons people develop anxiety, maybe it was a part of cultural upbringing, or experience. It is the lack of raising children with a resilient attitude or we have just been unlucky to at something.
Whatever the case, we know it is possible to not let it ruin your life, your health, your relationships and your success.
For those who work through it and win more than they lose please share how you do it, be a part of our The Story Of Your Health podcast, just visit the website www.thestoryofyourhealth.com click on the members vault and join.
Over the coming episodes we will explore many ways of having a good mental health, especially managing anxiety. If you have specific things you want me to cover please email me, and if you like today's episode please like and leave a comment below.
But for today as you go around, be aware of what in your everyday life bothers you, a word of warning, just look at superficial things, things that you are ok living with.
Like my fear of my lime tree, yes, I know, I know. But you have to understand, my beautiful lime tree had stinky bugs, which I was removed with a tong, suddenly one of the bug squirted this thing straight in my eye, oh my chilli pickle, it was stinging and burning; I staggered back, I could not control it I ran to the sink, I tripped and fell on my rt arm. And pulled the ligament. Of my arm, now I am lying there, nursing my eye, my hand and my knee and my miserable life. I was so upset with those stinky bugs, for doing this to me, then I was upset with the lime tree to get stinky bugs, then I was upset with myself for getting upset with the lime tree and bugs. Then I was upset with myself again, to be scared of going near the lime tree. I wanted to pull that lime tree and burn it. I could not do it, it had taken me years to get it to a place when it was fruiting.
I know its funny but it's also not funny,
But lets see the line of fear, I used to have a tendency to fall, growing up, one minute I am admiring the nature next minute I am tasting dirt, worst I did not even know how I got there, so I grew up with the word “man gunni”, which translates to “ stupid dreamer”, I grew out of it till I was pregnant, then it started all over again, I would roll down my drive way and then drag my self to THE wall or tree so I can pull my self up, with 3rd child I fell and was paralysed waist down, due to spinal cord injury, so can you see what the fall brings up.
I have always been scared of creatures, I was bitten by my neighbour's swan, tortured by my sister's monkey, bitten by a dog stung by centipede 3 times and attacked by rooster and toppled over by a pregnant goat. I know you are laughing, but hey it all hurt. So very very very much. And don't forget annoying family members who would recall these memories at most in opportune moments.
You should have seen me, I used to be overtaken by panic thinking of going near the lime tree, you should have heard my pep talk to myself, when I needed to prune or feed the tree, you should have heard my heartbeat when I had to even go close to that tree.
So yes I am laughing too, but it's now and though my heart is starting to feel a bit heavy, I can live with it. So choose something you can live with and explore that story, do not touch, deeper wound, we will go there together.
So I repeat your task again, look at what causes you anxiety and explore it, even better share it in our fb group. Link to join is in the show notes. Join our private facebook group, I can hear your stories there.
See you there...
Ref
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety
https://adaa.org/about-adaa/press-room/facts-statistics
file:///C:/Users/David/Downloads/SN06988.pdf
